Hand Sanitizer

There are a few words of which both of my kids will inadvertently mix up some of the letters.  I don't think it's horribly uncommon.  For example, both Edee and Chicken say "aminal" in place of animal consistently, and say "cimmanin" instead of cinnamon.

The most recent one though, had me laughing.

Edee:  We can dust use sand hanitizer when we are at the museum.
Me:  What was that you were going to use?
Edee:  Sand hanitizer.
Me:  Hand sanitizer.
Edee:  Yeah, sand hanitzer.

Then Chicken today...

Chicken:  Mom, I meed some hanitzer.
Me: Chicken, you are NOT allowed in my bag.  Stay out of my bag.
Chicken:  Hanitizer!!!  I meed hanitizer!  Please!  Please I meed hanitizer!!
Me:  No Chicken.
Chicken: WWAHHHHH!  Hanitizer!!  Hanitizer!  I meed it!!

I should be called hanitizer, just to simplify things.  Kids have this stuff figured out.

Three

Me:  How many charms are on the bracelet?
Chicken:  I dunno.
Me:  Let's count them.  1....2....3.
Chicken:  Free!
Me:  Yep.  Three, just like you.  You are three year old.
Chicken:  What in heck!!
Me:  ....What?
Chicken:  Why do I keeping on being free?  UGH!
Me:  You'll be three for awhile, Chicken.
Chicken:  Ugh!!

The novelty of being a new age wears off quickly, apparently

Sweet Sickie

Chicken has been sick this week.

 I ask him what he wants for lunch and he tell me a " 'moof-fie" (smoothie).  I get it ready in the kitchen, but peek over in the living room to make sure he's not asleep before turning on the the blender.  He doesn't like loud noises, including the blender, and I didn't want to send him into a conniption.He is asleep, so I start tucking the blankets around him to make him into a little bundle in order to take him up to his bed upstairs.

Chicken:  Mom, what are you doing, I'm sleep-een.
Me: I was going to turn on the blender and didn't want to wake you up, so I was taking you upstairs to sleep in your room.
Chicken:  Dat's okay, I dust want to sleep here.
Me:  Will the blender scare you?
Chicken:  No, I'm fine wit' the blender on.
Me:  Okay sweetie.
Chicken: Danks for tucking me in, Mom.

He rolls back over to fall asleep.
Total heart melt.

I turn on the blender and come check on him when it's finished.  He appears asleep.  A moment later he rouses a bit and murmers--

Chicken: Da blender help-ed me to fall asleep Mom."
Me:  Oh.  Okay, good.

I quietly pick up the laptop and sit down to write this down.

Chicken:  Mom!  You dust woke -ed me up.
Me:  Sorry.
Chicken:  Dust don't do it again, kay?

LOL.  (more like QGOL--quiet giggle out loud).  That kid.

Then after waking up from his nap.

Me:  Did you have a nice nap?
Chicken:  Yah.  Da blender was good for me to fall asleep.  Da blender was good for me.  Did your mom turn on da blender for you to fall asleep when you were a kid?
Me: Ha, no....but I liked the sound of the washing machine to fall asleep....

The magical soothing blender. Who knew? Just last week he was terrified of it.

Peacock

Edee grabs one of those "grown-up" coloring books with abstract designs off of a shelf and brings it over to where I am sitting with Chicken.

Edee:  Mommy, you need to color one of dese pik-shures for Chicken, like you did for me.
Me:  Okay, there are some things I need to get done first.  Maybe later today.
Edee:  Look, Chicken, do you like dis one?
Chicken:  Yeah!

They chatter on some more, I'm not paying attention.

Edee:  Mom!  Chicken wants dis one because it looks like a dead peacock!
Me:  Wha...
Chicken:  Yeah!  It does!  It weally does!
Me:  Gross, a dead peacock?
Edee:  Yeah!  Color dis one for him, okay?
Me:  Hmmmm....not sure how I feel about that.

They chatter on some more.

Edee:  Mom, we want you do color dis one.
Me:  Because it looks like a dead peacock?
Edee:  No, it looks like a porky-pine wit feaders (feathers) in it.  Dat's why.
Chicken:  Yeah!

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

Teenager

Edee. The girl who has wanted to grow up ever since she's understood the concept of growing up.

I've been a leader in the Young Women's Organization (Youth Group at our church) in one capacity or another for the majority of Edee's existence.  Before she existed, even.  Subsequently, she knows all about it (or at least thinks she does) and simply can't wait until she's a twelve year old herself.

Edee:  Mom!  I love my CTR 5 class (church class for five year olds) SO much!  It's so much fun.
Me:  Good, I'm glad! You have great teachers and great friends there.
Edee:  Yeah.  And soon!  Soon I will be in Young Womens' and see you there, Mom.
Me: Whoa.  Not too soon. I'm glad you are excited but you still have seven years to go.  You sure are getting big though.
Edee:  Yeah!  I can't believe I'm getting so big.  I am growing up, Mom.  Soon I'll be a teenager.
Me:  Now don't say that.
Edee:  Why not?
Me:  Because some teenagers can be a bit....scary...I guess.  I hope you are nice to me.....are you going to be nice to me?
Edee:  I don't know yet, Mom. Sorry, we'll just have to wait to find out.
Me:  Whaaaaat.
Chicken:  I will!  I will be nice to you Mom!
Me:  I believe you Chicken.....
Edee:  No Chicken, you don't know that yet.
Chicken:  I do!
Edee:  You don't know that.  You'll have to wait and see.  But, you know more than adults do.  We usually do.  Kids do know more than adults.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT.  What the what.

Is it plain to see why I'm legitimately scared about Edee and this teenager business??

Potty Talk

Potty training has been going  *slowly* with Chicken.  It's been a drawn out process.  We take a few steps forward, we take a few steps back.  Such is life, as they say.

I definitely wouldn't say it's been a good experience.  But, if there is a positive note,  I do have to say that it's pretty cute how he announces that he needs to use the potty...you know, on the rare occasion that that happens.   He'll say:  "I feel like to pee!", or "I feel like to poop!!".  Pretty much he just leaves out the "I need" part every single time.   I know it sounds wrong to state that someone can be adorable while referring to to their bodily functions, but really, really it really is.

We were driving to church and the kids stated that the truck made a sound.  I didn't hear it, but as they were talking about it, Chicken says in his sweet little voice, "The truck feels like to poop!".  We all laugh, which is what he was going for.  What a funny little guy!

On a side note, a lady told me yesterday that I need to send his picture into GAP kids because he could totally model.  "You really should do it.  He has that look," she said.  I know what she means, he does have that look.  This is why I can't help being crazy about Chicken--he's funny, sweet, smart, and model-worthy handsome.  He just has it all.

 Well, besides the ability to not poop and pee in his pants, that is, so....maybe he doesn't.

Singing

Chicken picked out a "baby show" to watch while he was getting his hair cut a few days ago.  Gotta keep that wiggly little head still; I'll do whatever it takes.   The show, which was geared towards infants, had a mellow, monotonous theme song that easily gets stuck in your head (as many children's shows' theme songs tend to do).

So yesterday, out of the blue Daddy belts out the lyrics.... in a purposely obnoxious, falsetto voice.

Daddy:  "My child!  Me and Baby First TV.  My child!  Me and Baby First TV.  My child--"
Chicken:  No Dad!  It's not cute when you do it!
Edee:  EEEH!  Dad!  Dat's not right!
Daddy (ignoring them):  "My Child!  Me and Baby First TV--"
Edee:  Stop!! Dat's not right, Dad!
Daddy:  "My--"
Chicken:  STOP Dad!  It's not cute when YOU do it!  See, watch me.
(then with a sheepish little grin):  "My Child!  Me and Baby First TV...."  See? Dat's cute.  It's not cute when YOU do it!!

Oh the protest.   Oh the cuteness (or the lack thereof, depending on who's referring to who).
Oh the entertainment.

Hilarious

We are getting ready to meet up with some friends at the nearby trampoline park, and Edee suddenly comes down with an upset stomach and all that that entails.  After breaking the news that we need to stay home, she (unsurprisingly) melts down.  Daddy is consoling Edee downstairs, and I hear Chicken coming up the stairs.

Chicken:  Dis is 'ilarious!! Mom!  Dis is 'ilarious!
Me:  What's hilarious?
Chicken:  Dat we are staying home.
Me:  Chicken, do you know what 'hilarious' means?
Chicken:  No.  What does it mean?
Me:  It means that something is really funny.  I don't think that's what you meant.
Chicken:  Oh!

.....but it's so fun trying out new words :)

Goals

Goals have been the topic of the week here.  In addition to it being a new year, I taught Joy School lessons about goals for our preschool group.

Me:  So have you been thinking of the goals you want to work on during Joy School?
Student 1:  My goal is to finish my work on time!
Me:  Very nice, that's a great goal.
Student 2:  I'm going to stay calm and be nice!
Me:  That's wonderful.
Edee:  I'm going to help my friends.
Me:  Nice.  How about you work on including everyone also along with that.  What about you Chicken?
Chicken:  I'm going to jump on a cloud!!
Me:  Uh....ok, that sounds fun, but let's think of something we can do during school time...
Chicken:  I want to pack-tice jumping on da cloud!

The other kids are giggling.  After a few minutes of a (pointless) debate about it with Chicken, I suggest something else about helping Mom out and jot it on his chart.

A few days later, we are talking about new chore charts we made and family goals as part of a family night.

Me:  Okay, so I am going to put our charts upstairs where we can see them.  Should we keep the same goals or should we do something else?  Hmm....how about Daddy and I keep the same goals we had.  Edee, do you want to keep the same goal about not whining?
Edee:  Yeah!  I didn't whine today! I get a smiley face!!
Me:  Okay, and Chicken, do you want to keep the same goal of using the potty or do you want to do something else, like not throwing fits?
Chicken:  I want to jump on a cloud!!!
Daddy:  Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Me:   Ugh.  Funny to you Daddy, but this isn't the first time I've heard this.  Uh, okay, honey, you really can't jump on a cloud.  And even if you could, it's not something we can practice at home together in our family.  Do you want to work on staying dry? Or not throwing fits?
Chicken:  I want to jump on a cloud!  ONLY dat one!
Me:  Okay.  Listen.  Sorry to burst your bubble, but you can't do that.  It won't work.
Chicken:  Only jumping on a cloud.
Me:   No.  Hmmm....what should our goal be for you?
Chicken:  DAT is a goal, get a goal FOR ME.  DAT IS DA GOAL, get a goal for me!!

Well.  I guess that is the case....my goal now is to find a goal for Clayton that we can agree on (or that is at least more realistic than jumping on a cloud).  

Disaster

Edee refers to anything that happened in the past as "last year".  Since we're only three days into the new year, technically she is now correct any time she refers to something that happened "last year".

We're driving to church as a family and she remarks about something that happened "last year".

Me:  Yep.  Edee, do you realize that THIS year you'll be going to kindergarten?
Edee (eyes lit up):  I am!??
Daddy:  Wait!  She is?......Whoa....this year?  What.....how'd that happen?
Me:  I know, so exciting!  In September, Edee.  That's about nine months away.
Daddy:  That's so crazy that will happen this year.
Me (talking to Daddy quietly): We also said that this year we'd talk about whether or not we'll try to get P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T.
Daddy:  What....oh no.....
Edee:  Mom!!  What does dat spell?? Tell me!!
Daddy:  It spells 'Disaster'.
Edee:  Oh right, I knew dat already.

Mmmm hmmm.

Heck

Chicken was in the bathroom with me as I was getting ready this morning.

Me:   Hmmm....where is my contact solution....am I out?  Where is it....
Chicken:  What in heck!?  What in heck!? What in heck!?
Me:  Oh, there it is.
Chicken:  Mom.... is 'what in heck' a good word??
Me:  Um.  No... it's not the best thing to say.
Chicken:  But Mom, we say "what in heck" when we can't find fings.

Such a proud feeling as a mother to know that you've taught your child something so refined.

Oranges

Happy New Year 2016!  I know I missed a lot of cute Edee and Chickenisms, but the month of December was a very busy one.  I'm recommitting to capture the kids conversations a little better this year.

I've posted before about how Chicken LOVES orange juice.  It's the only drink he asks for.  But even if it's apple juice, grape juice, or whatever juice we have....it's still "owange duice" to him and acceptable.

He *usually* enjoys oranges themselves also; except.... for when they are too fresh, apparently.

Me:  Here Chicken, eat your orange and then I'll get you the rest of your lunch.
Chicken:  My owange is too fwesh!  Fwesh!!  I don't like it, it's too fwesh for me!
Me:  You're orange is too fresh?  Are you sure?
Chicken:  What does 'too fwesh' mean?
Me:  It means nice and new.
Chicken:  It's too fwesh and I don't like it!

The fact is that the oranges were a little old, which is what I think he was trying to say...they weren't fresh!

That was a few weeks ago.  Today, Chicken asked me to sit by him at the little table while he drank the orange juice I poured him (which, by-the-way, is always heavily watered down since the kid drinks so much of the stuff).

Me:  Oh, do you even have any juice left in there?

He takes a big swig to down the rest of small amount left in the cup.

Chicken:  I dust drank da last blump!

I could not control the laughter.  It was just so cute and funny how he said it.  I have no idea where he got the word "blump". Of course my reaction caught Edee and Daddy's attention, and after I related what happened, Edee immediately asked if should could have a blump of orange juice too.

This one here is a trend-setter, I feel it.