Daddy wrangles Edee for a diaper change and proceeds to change her. I'm sitting on the couch.
Daddy: "Oh this is a weird one..." He proceeds to give a graphic description of Edee's poop.
Me: "Spare me the details."
Daddy: "But it is--"
Me: "Really? Do you not think I've seen enough weird poop? With the past almost 3 years of babies in diapers I believe I've had my fair share."
Edee: "HA HA HA, it not poop!! It chicken nuggets!!"
Daddy: "Chicken nuggets?"
Me: "Wha......wait, did you use the word 'nugget' when you felt the need to tell me all about the contents of her diaper?"
Daddy: "Oh, I guess I did."
Edee: "An a arb-a-cue yash!"
Daddy: "I have no idea what she said."
Me (laughing): "She said 'and barbeque sauce', ha ha."
I'm really glad I didn't change that diaper.
Oh noodles.
"Edee" and "Chicken" are nicknames for my two little rascals. The names originated from how my daughter would pronounce both her own and little brother's name when she first started talking. They've stuck. Chicken may live to regret that someday....
Monday, September 9, 2013
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Walmart
Edee: "Mommy, I wan a go a Wah-mart a day."
Me: "Why do you want to go to Walmart?"
Edee: "Uh, I wan a get a yion, an da tigers, an a animals...yike dat."
Me: "We are going to have to ask Daddy, those things cost money, hon. Do you have any money?"
Edee: "No. You, you, YOU ha money, Mommy! It in your purse. One money (holding up both of her pointer fingers from each hand). No, you ha TWO monies, Mommy."
Me: "I think it's more money than that to buy a tiger at Walmart."
Edee: "Oh oh oh, a COW. I wan a mommy cow, an a daddy cow, an a baby cow!!"
Me: "That is a lot of money to buy all those cows."
Edee: "Mmm, one cow? Ooooo OOOooo OOOOO, a baby cow. Peeeeeease?"
Me: "We'll ask Daddy, maybe you can earn some money for a baby cow. What can you do to help mommy today to get some money?"
Edee: "Uh.....hmmmm....pee on da potty, be a big girl, (mutter mutter), an boy parts. yike dat."
Me: ".....what about boy parts?"
Edee: "yike a boy parts. Yike dat"
Me: "Hummm, well...." We refer to anatomical differences between males and females in our house, for the time-being, as 'girl parts' and 'boy parts', so I'm intrigued about what she is trying to say, but veer back to the most important matter at hand, "Do you want to go sit on the potty?"
Edee: "No, I already peed in my diah-per ah in my jammies."
Me: Big sigh.
Edee: "I need a make a yist, mommy, fo a baby cow at Wah-mart!!"
So, she made her "list" before we went to Walmart--after I changed her diaper and out of her jammies, of course. I know it may be too much to expect my two-year-old to understand budgeting skills, but is it too much to ask that she pees on the potty?
Me: "Why do you want to go to Walmart?"
Edee: "Uh, I wan a get a yion, an da tigers, an a animals...yike dat."
Me: "We are going to have to ask Daddy, those things cost money, hon. Do you have any money?"
Edee: "No. You, you, YOU ha money, Mommy! It in your purse. One money (holding up both of her pointer fingers from each hand). No, you ha TWO monies, Mommy."
Me: "I think it's more money than that to buy a tiger at Walmart."
Edee: "Oh oh oh, a COW. I wan a mommy cow, an a daddy cow, an a baby cow!!"
Me: "That is a lot of money to buy all those cows."
Edee: "Mmm, one cow? Ooooo OOOooo OOOOO, a baby cow. Peeeeeease?"
Me: "We'll ask Daddy, maybe you can earn some money for a baby cow. What can you do to help mommy today to get some money?"
Edee: "Uh.....hmmmm....pee on da potty, be a big girl, (mutter mutter), an boy parts. yike dat."
Me: ".....what about boy parts?"
Edee: "yike a boy parts. Yike dat"
Me: "Hummm, well...." We refer to anatomical differences between males and females in our house, for the time-being, as 'girl parts' and 'boy parts', so I'm intrigued about what she is trying to say, but veer back to the most important matter at hand, "Do you want to go sit on the potty?"
Edee: "No, I already peed in my diah-per ah in my jammies."
Me: Big sigh.
Edee: "I need a make a yist, mommy, fo a baby cow at Wah-mart!!"
So, she made her "list" before we went to Walmart--after I changed her diaper and out of her jammies, of course. I know it may be too much to expect my two-year-old to understand budgeting skills, but is it too much to ask that she pees on the potty?
Possesive
I'm in the kitchen, putting away dishes. Chicken is in his highchair, eating (more like throwing) peas. Edee had been bouncing around doing one thing or another, until suddenly, she is clutching my legs and starts yelling at Chicken.
Edee: "MINE! My mommy. MY mommy. MINE!"
Chicken: *cute baby chuckle* (He is thinking this is great. I find it quite humorous myself, though I'm getting slighting agitated about only being able to move my feet 2-3 inches at a time to get to the dishes).
Edee: "No Chicken!!!!! My mommy!! MY MOMMY!"
Chicken: "Ba ba."
Edee: "ARRRRRGGGH. NOOO!! IT MY MOMMY! MINE!! NAH YOURS, MINE!! GRRRRR."
Now I don't claim to be the most proficient baby-babble translator, but last time I checked, "Ba ba" was not a rebuttal declaring sole ownership of one's mother. I very well could be wrong....
Edee: "MINE! My mommy. MY mommy. MINE!"
Chicken: *cute baby chuckle* (He is thinking this is great. I find it quite humorous myself, though I'm getting slighting agitated about only being able to move my feet 2-3 inches at a time to get to the dishes).
Edee: "No Chicken!!!!! My mommy!! MY MOMMY!"
Chicken: "Ba ba."
Edee: "ARRRRRGGGH. NOOO!! IT MY MOMMY! MINE!! NAH YOURS, MINE!! GRRRRR."
Now I don't claim to be the most proficient baby-babble translator, but last time I checked, "Ba ba" was not a rebuttal declaring sole ownership of one's mother. I very well could be wrong....
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Oh Dear.
While the kids were napping Saturday, Daddy and I started prepping our bay window in the living room to be painted. We took down the window treatments and taped around all the trim.
Edee woke up from her nap, came walking into the living room, and spotted the window. Bewilderment clouded her face as her eyes scanned the unrecognizable window from corner to corner. Finally her confused eyes met mine.
Edee (looking down, sadly): "Oh de-ah."
Me: "The window looks different, huh."
Edee (sighing): "The widow is bue." (blue...from the painters tape).
I almost feel like I did something wrong to have recieved so much disapproval.
Edee woke up from her nap, came walking into the living room, and spotted the window. Bewilderment clouded her face as her eyes scanned the unrecognizable window from corner to corner. Finally her confused eyes met mine.
Edee (looking down, sadly): "Oh de-ah."
Me: "The window looks different, huh."
Edee (sighing): "The widow is bue." (blue...from the painters tape).
I almost feel like I did something wrong to have recieved so much disapproval.
Monday, September 2, 2013
Mood Swings
Me: "Edee we are going to go to the store once we're dressed. Go get some clothes on and I'll get changed too."
Edee (sitting on the floor and throwing her hands down on her lap): "Humph. I'm mad. I don't WAN to go to the store again. Humph. I'm MAD! Grrrr. I DON wanna GO to the store. Forever!!!"
Me: "Wow....you don't want to ever go to the store ever again? Well....I need to go to the store, we need food. What would you rather do instead? "
Edee (all the sudden the mad voice is gone, sweet happy voice instead): "Mommy I wan to go to the store wit you. Lemme hep you get dessed." She jumps up, runs over to my dresser opens my drawer, pulls out a pair of jeans, then to another drawer to get a shirt, and hands them to me. "Its your wav-rit (favorite), mommy, bue pants."
Me: "Thanks Edee. I do like to wear blue pants. What color shirt did you get for me?"
Edee: "Purple! Purple is your wav-rit too! It my wav-rit too! Oh wait." She runs to her room and gets herself a purple shirt. I help her find some blue pants. "We match, mommy! Yook!"
Me: "Look at that. We do match indeed."
As we finished getting ready to go to the store, in matching apparel, I had to tell myself that this intense, fast mood swing wasn't a symptom of multiple personality disorder....it was just a reminder that Edee is 100%, through and through, female...and so my daughter.
Edee (sitting on the floor and throwing her hands down on her lap): "Humph. I'm mad. I don't WAN to go to the store again. Humph. I'm MAD! Grrrr. I DON wanna GO to the store. Forever!!!"
Me: "Wow....you don't want to ever go to the store ever again? Well....I need to go to the store, we need food. What would you rather do instead? "
Edee (all the sudden the mad voice is gone, sweet happy voice instead): "Mommy I wan to go to the store wit you. Lemme hep you get dessed." She jumps up, runs over to my dresser opens my drawer, pulls out a pair of jeans, then to another drawer to get a shirt, and hands them to me. "Its your wav-rit (favorite), mommy, bue pants."
Me: "Thanks Edee. I do like to wear blue pants. What color shirt did you get for me?"
Edee: "Purple! Purple is your wav-rit too! It my wav-rit too! Oh wait." She runs to her room and gets herself a purple shirt. I help her find some blue pants. "We match, mommy! Yook!"
Me: "Look at that. We do match indeed."
As we finished getting ready to go to the store, in matching apparel, I had to tell myself that this intense, fast mood swing wasn't a symptom of multiple personality disorder....it was just a reminder that Edee is 100%, through and through, female...and so my daughter.
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