Shower

When you're a mom, seemingly simple things get complicated.  Like, taking a shower, for instance. I feel like I could count the number of peaceful showers I've had in the past four years on my fingers and toes.

I always have the kids in the bathroom with me while I shower if Daddy's not home--sometimes they are in there even when he's home, otherwise I run the risk of listening to them banging on the door crying for me or asking for something.    Usually I bring in toys or something for them to occupy themselves with.  That works out okay most of the time.  There have been times when I've had to jump out all sudsy to assist someone crying, and times that they have escaped unknown to me until I feel the draft coming in from the door.  There have been other times that they've gotten into my makeup.  Grrrr.

Then there's times like today.

I'm rinsing my hair when all of the sudden the shower curtain opens and a little naked body hurdles in.

Me: Whoa, hey.  What are you doing, Edee?
Edee:  Um, well I dust was smelling myself, and when I was smelling I weah-yized (realized) dat I was stinky.  So, I come-ed into the shower wit you.
Me:  Alright...

A minute later, the corner of the curtain opens a bit again.

Chicken:  You okay, Mommy?
Me:  I'm okay.
Chicken:  OKAY MOMMY?
Me:  I'm okay Chicken.  Thank you.
Chicke:  EWA!!  YOU OKAY?
Edee:  Yeah!!
Chicken:  YOU OKAY, EWA???
Edee:  Yes Chicken!!!!

The curtain falls back, just to pop open again.  This time Chicken has a flashlight he's shining in.

Crap, I forgot he had that.

Chicken:  YOU OKAY?
Me:  Yes, Chicken. We are okay.  Thank you.

Etc.

This particular shower ended prematurely when the shower rod and curtain came crashing down.   It also took about half an hour afterwards to get Edee dressed. All the while Chicken is shining the flashlight on her asking where her boy parts are and various other anatomy questions.

 Showering.  Such a seemingly simple thing.....

Orbit

Daddy and I have recently made a new arrangement for my personal sanity.  It's that when he gets home from work and while I'm making dinner, he has "science time" with the kids.  That way they are occupied while I'm cooking, instead of the usual hanging on my legs crying to be held and begging for fruit snacks.

So far the new arrangement has worked out quite well.

Last week, Daddy was asking the kids questions about what they had learned  a few days prior.

Daddy: Edee, what orbits around the sun?
Edee:  Da Earff!!
Daddy:  Good, the earth!  Chicken, do you remember what orbits the earth?
Chicken:  A COIN!!!
Mommy:  I'm guessing you used a coin in your moon visual with the globe?
Daddy:  Yep.

Of course we all thought it was hilarious.  Chicken especially.

Then today (a few days later) I hear the kids talking to each other while eating breakfast. I'm at the sink cleaning up dishes, just listening.

Chicken:  Yook!  Da ball is 'pinning, da earff!! Bit-ting! (Look, the ball is spinning around the earth!  It's orbiting!)
Edee:  No Chicken, da only fings dat orbits da earf is da 'pace station and da moon. (the only things that orbit the earth are the space station and the moon).

Well, looks like science time is paying off.   Another benefit is that the kids have actually been eating their dinner now that I'm not having to pump them full of snacks to leave me alone so I have free hands to cook.  Kudos to Daddy for keeping their attention--and to me, of course, for having the brilliant idea :)

Juice

Chicken loves "owan duce" (aka orange juice).   The thing is that all juice is "orange" juice.  This took me awhile to figure out.  In order to differentiate which kind of juice he'd like there is "yeyow (yellow) owan duce" and "black owan duce".

No amount of convincing can persuade him otherwise.

Independence

Edee and I have had several conversations lately that have ended like this one.

Edee:  Mommy will you take my socks off?
Me:  Your feet are going to be cold if I do.
Edee--I know Mom, but I don care.  I wanna do what I wanna do.

And Chicken and I have had just as many which have ended like this:

Chicken:  Leave my lone!!!!!

Such independent little people they think they are.

Trampoline

Driving home from Joy School, we were spelling out names of some of Edee's friends.  It just so happened that all of the names we had spelled so far all had "L's" in them.

Me:  Did you know your full name has an "L" in it too, Edee?  E-V-A-N-G-E-L-I-N-E.   Evangeline.
Edee:  Ban-jo-ween?  Why my name is Ban-jo-ween?
Me:  Because Mommy and Daddy named you Evangeline and we just call you Edee for short.  Remember?
Edee:  Oh. Yeah.

A minute later.

Edee: I wish we had a tam-po-ween (trampoline).
Me:  What....why?  Who has a trampoline? None of your friends do.
Edee:  My new friends in Idaho did.
Me (wondering where this shift in conversation suddenly came from):  Did you see one today?
Edee:  no, I just want a tampoween.  To jump on all da time.
Me:  I don't think we are going to get one.  Sorry.
Edee:  We can get one for Kissmas!
Me:  Christmas is over.
Edee:  Yeah, I aweady know dat.  We can get one for next Kissmas.
Me:  Good luck convincing Daddy of that one.

It took me a moment or two more to realize that 'Evangeline' and 'trampoline' sound just enough alike to have started this whole thought process.  If I would have know that giving her this name would have caused trampoline envy, I might have rethought that.

Jelly Beans

Chicken has been in this phase lately where he runs away and hides when it's time to change his diaper....not fun.  So this morning after really not wanting to chase him again, I resorted to the classic, reliable parenting technique:  bribery.  With jelly beans. My kids are pretty obsessed with jelly beans (what kid isn't?) and Daddy had stocked up on them while I was out of town.

Me:  Chicken, time to change your diaper.
Chicken:  Okay!  (and then he runs away)
Me:  Chicken, if you go lay down on the floor and let me change your diaper I'll give you jelly beans.
Chicken:  Okay!  (this time he complies)

I give him one jelly bean.

Chicken:  Mmmm, gum??
Me:  Yep I think that was the bubble gum flavor.  You'll get another one when we are done.
Chicken:  I wanna geen (green) one!
Me:  Okay, when we are finished.
Edee:  I want one!
Me:  Clean up the dishes and you can have one.

She does.  We finish the diaper change. They surround me jumping up and down for the jelly beans as I get ready to deal out the goods.

Me:  What color did you want again?
Chicken:  ALL A 'DEM!  ALL A DEM!!!!!
Edee:  Yeah!  All of dem!

Now that I'm thinking about it,  I recall it was green that Chicken wanted.  They each ran off with two extra jelly beans than originally bargained for.....somehow they always have the upper hand, especially when I start patting myself on the back for my parenting skills....

Big Sister

It's 2015.  Chicken and Edee are two and four years old.

They are cutely snuggling up together on the couch.  Chicken reaches up and strokes Edee's cheek, looking at her lovingly.

Chicken:  You my big yit-yahr (sister)?
Then not waiting for an answer and nodding his head--
Chicken:  Yeah. My big yit-yahr.
Edee:  Yeah I is you big yister.  I take care of you.
Me:  You do a good job taking care of him.
Edee:  Yeah and you take care of me, Mommy, and Daddy take care of you!!
Me:  Ha....something like that.

I love the little thought process to that.